Difficulties in making decisions? Decision stress doesn't have to be!

Indecision is a burden for many people in everyday life, and many struggle with decision-making difficulties. It starts with simple things, such as standing in front of the closet in the morning: the gray blazer or the black one?

Decision-making difficulties! A problem that is bothering more and more people - but it doesn't have to be...
As long as it's only about choosing an item of clothing, a TV movie or an order in a restaurant, decision-making difficulties are not particularly stressful. In most cases, they just get on the nerves of the people around you who have difficulty making decisions and, in the worst case, put a strain on your relationship with your loved ones.

However, it becomes considerably more stressful when you have to make decisions with far-reaching consequences. If you can hardly decide which jacket to wear in the morning, how are you supposed to know whether you'd rather stay with your partner or whether it would be better to end the relationship? Is the new job offer the right one?

Das sind dann Situationen im Leben, in denen man sich zu Entscheidungen gezwungen sieht, die von größter Tragweite sind – die vielleicht Lebensaspekte betreffen, die Sie bis jetzt als gegeben oder nicht veränderbar ansahen.
Welcher Weg ist der “richtige” für mich? Auch jede Entscheidung, die Sie nicht treffen beziehungsweise aufschieben, ist eine Entscheidung – nämlich die Entscheidung, alles beim Alten zu lassen.

Many people are so unsettled by this question that necessary decisions can paralyze them and plunge them into crises - out of concern that they are not making the right decision or out of overly perfect ideas.
As a result, they put off making any decisions - or wait until the decision is ultimately forced upon them by the circumstances and thus eludes their freedom of choice.

But how do decision-making difficulties manifest themselves?

Black-and-white thinking:
Here, experiences are divided into opposing extremes; there is no gradation (good-evil, right-wrong). 

Selective view:
Here, a single negative aspect of a situation is often overrated, while the other positive aspects are virtually ignored. 

Catastrophizing thinking:
Only negative events are predicted as consequences of the decision. All other eventualities are excluded.

Overgeneralization:
A negative aspect of a situation is immediately related to the whole person. 

Personalization: Events are related to one's own person for no apparent reason. 

What is the problem? - Reasons for decision-making difficulties

Die Ursachen für Entscheidungsschwierigkeiten wurzeln meistens tief und bestimmen irgendwann das gesamte Leben, welches täglich geprägt ist von unzähligen großen und kleinen, bewussten und unbewussten Entscheidungen. Existiert in diesem Bereich unserer Persönlichkeit eine Blockade, hat diese Tatsache deshalb auch eine ‘entscheidende’ Wirkung auf das gesamte Leben.

As soon as there are several options, we quickly feel overwhelmed and become stressed.
Of course, the outcome of our decision is often uncertain, and the decision may set us in stone for several years. In addition, we may also be judged or criticized by others and, in the worst case, conflicts may arise, for example with close relatives.
In addition, decisions are sometimes associated with losses, because if you say "yes" to something, you will probably have to do without something else. This loss in turn has a negative effect on your individual reward system - as a result, you then feel bad.
Making a decision inevitably means taking responsibility and perhaps this current decision is the first real one in your life for which you have to bear the consequences. Consequently, you also find yourself in a position of justification: "Why did you make this particular choice and not another?".

Aus der Möglichkeit zu wählen kann ein ähnlicher Zustand entstehen wie bei Überstimulation: die verschiedenen Entscheidungsmöglichkeiten können letztlich einfach nur noch überfordernd wirken – es entsteht ein „Entscheidungsstress”.

Neben dem Punkt der “zu großen Auswahl” können Entscheidungsschwierigkeiten auch noch weitere Ursachen haben: 

• Sie scheuen sich, „unsichere“ Schritte zu gehen. Es sollte vielmehr alles berechenbar und “sicher” sein.
• Sie haben hohe Erwartungen und Ansprüche an uns selbst. Unsere Entscheidung soll die “perfekte Lösung” sein.
• Perhaps decisions were taken away from you when you were young because you took longer to make a decision than others - or because you seemed shy, anxious and insecure.
• In our youth, they were not allowed to take reasonable risks or were not protected against them.
• People often have a tendency to conform and let others decide for them because they are afraid of exposing themselves and having to take responsibility.
  Life fears, trauma, mental illness, bad experiences with decisions, etc. can also paralyze our ability to make decisions.

Unfortunately, due to the dynamics of private and professional life, you are inevitably confronted with having to make decisions again and again
If you are then under additional stress or in conflict with yourself, you are unable to see clearly.

 It becomes more and more stressful to deal with the pending decision, you feel like you're constantly going round in circles - even at night you're just tossing and turning over this problem. In the worst case scenario, this is followed by severe self-doubt, feelings of failure and permanent dejection...

You are afraid of making the wrong decision, of not being able to cope with the consequences and of making a big mistake.

But it doesn't have to come to that!
Because psychological advisors are there for you when you feel you can't get any further with an issue on your own.

As part of psychological counseling sessions, new problem-solving strategies are first developed together with you and then their implementation is professionally supported.
Together with a competent, objective psychological advisor, you get to the bottom of the issue, then work out key criteria for the decision and consider in detail which individual values, reasons and principles the decision should correspond to. During the consultation, you will receive objective support in weighing up the pros and cons.

However, a decision must not only be made - it should also be implemented. The psychological consultant will work with you to develop implementation strategies so that the decision can ultimately be implemented in a stress-free and positive manner.

However, psychological counseling is not - and should not be - curative treatment. Rather, psychological counseling is conscious and planned psychological counseling and support for healthy people of all ages in a wide variety of problematic and decision-making situations.